Dear God

Dear God,

My knees are sore, my throat is raw, my faith is shaken. I feel like a failure. Why did you have to take Philip away from us? Why is my husband so upset? Where will my life go? Have I been too much of a push over. I love the idea of a family with Steve. If this is not your will I will understand. I seem to never get what I want. I give up lord. I give it to you. If it will work great if not I will be fine. Make him realize how great I am. Please dont let him feel bad about himself anymore. Please give him the strength to support me. Please let him know that everything I did for him was for love. I appreciate all the small things about him. I love his laugh, the way he plays guitar, the way he holds me, his corny jokes, the fact that a simple hug from him changes my entire day. PLease let him have fun tonight and then come home to me. PLease dont let him see the pain anymore. I am trusting in you lord. Help me have more patience. Love you lord.

Beckie